All eyes are on you.
You feel the peering of countless stares.
You begin to perspire
And your hands become as limp fish.
Your mind races with every step.
You can’t feel your legs.
Your lips and tongue can form no
intelligible words.
Your feet have become buckets of cement.
You begin to cover yourself with your
hands
Pulling your jacket to as you bend your
head down.
You begin to walk fast as to avoid
attention.
You have become paranoid and unnerved.
You begin to question yourself
Wondering how you looked and sounded.
You begin to criticize yourself
Replaying every word that flowed from
your mouth.
You begin to worry about accents and
gestures,
And how you presented yourself,
And how “they” interpreted you.
Your every word, every thought, every
movement…
Your body language, appearance, posture…
You feel your body become numb as
butterflies fill your stomach.
You are being watched, every second, of
every minute, of every hour.
Every hour of every day, of every month,
of every year.
Your life is on public display with no
reprieve.
You have no breathers to gather your
thoughts.
Regardless of how many times you check
the mirror
You still wonder what “they” think of how
you look.
You have to.
After all, it’s all about acceptance
isn’t it?
You have to put on a show to be noticed;
to be liked.
You’re not judged on your merits,
characteristics or personality.
No, you are judged by how you handle
yourself, how you talk, how you look…
Your feelings, emotions, viewpoints,
don’t matter.
They are viewed, but decisions are based
on more superficial ideas.
At least at first.
Then come your passions, desires and
convictions.
But do they match up to what is accepted?
So the show begins again.
You must fill your life with their goals.
You must understand what it is they want,
not what you want.
You must pursue what makes you happy if,
and ONLY “if” it’s what “they” want also.
You can’t be yourself and be accepted.
It’s your choice, or is it?
So who are you?
Are you an actor?
Are you a model or dancer?
Are you in entertainment at all?
Perhaps you sing?
Or maybe just play an instrument?
Alternative, Pop, Contemporary, Rock,
R&B, Jazz, Opera, Classical, Country, Christian…?
It doesn’t matter. It’s all the same.
No matter what field, what
classification, you’re still judged.
You are still obligated to live up to
“their” standards; “their” way of life.
You have to fit in or be alone.
Or be alone… what a choice.
So who are you?
Are you any of those things?
Do you classify yourself in any of those
categories?
No, you’re just you.
A normal person living a normal life.
No cameras, no lights, no screaming fans.
But the crowds, the nerves, the
questions, the paranoia…
They exist.
“But I’m normal. That’s not fair; not
right. Only God has the right…
Exactly.
